Manila Folders
Tom "Snert" Haunert
Chief Executive Officer, General Manager, & Player to be Named Later

Current roster and team schedule are maintained at Fanball.com.

A force to be reckoned with since FAUX's inception, the migratory franchise currently known as the Pacifica Pathogens has a long history of fantasy feast or famine. An original FAUX Football franchise, initially as the Bangor Bittermen, the team has won 10 or more games three times. They have parlayed their successful seasons with great effectiveness, earning four division titles and four wildcard berths, ranking the club among FAUX's leaders in playoff appearances. Their 11-2 record in 1991 remains as one of FAUX's best single season winning percentages (.846) and the club has played in numerous FAUX Bowls.Although the team has remained in Pacifica since 2005, the club has moved 14 times since the league's founding. Along with Richard Milhouse Blanchard (Baltimore Buzzsaws) and John Crudo (Petaluma War Pigs), owner Tom Haunert was an inaugral member of the Everex Football League (1988), the precursor to the FAUX Football League also founded by Crudo.

Pathogen's Historical Franchise Regular Records
YEAR W L T YEAR W L T YEAR W L T YEAR W L T
1990 8 4 1 1991 11 2 0 1992 2 12 0 1993 7 7 0
1994 4 10 0 1995 11 3 0 1996 9 5 0 1997 6 8 0
1998 5 9 0 1999 5 9 0 2000 5 9 0 2001 3 11 0
2002 10 4 0 2003 6 8 0 2004 3 11 0 2005 9 5 0
2006 4 10 0 2007 3 11 0 2008 - - - 2009 - - -
TOTAL 111 138 1 .446

Founded: 1990

Home Field: The Petrie Bowl

Team Colors: Lime Green, Yellow, and Gray

Franchise Names
  • Bangor Bittermen (1990)
  • Batesville Buttheads (1991)
  • Benecia Bongwater (1992)
  • Newark Next Year (1993)
  • Tom News (1994)
  • Bolinas Bollweevils (1995)
  • Pescadero Piojos (1996)
  • Montara Maggots (1997)
  • Shelter Cove Shigellae (1998)
  • Gualala Giardia (1999)
  • Tomales Bay Trichinosis (2000)
  • Pismo Bay Paramecia (2001-02)
  • San Bruno Staph (2003-04)
  • Pacifica Pathogens (2005- )

Winning Percentage: .446 (111-138-1)

Division Championships
  • 1990 AIDS Conference Champions
  • 1991 Kirk Conference Champions
  • 1995 101st Airborne Division Champion
  • 2002 Olympia Division
Wildcard Playoff Appearances
  • 1993
  • 1994
  • 1996
  • 2005